Day 5: The Lone Gunmen

The Lone Gunmen
Status: Ended
Premiered: March 4, 2001
Last Aired: June 22, 2001
Show Categories:Action/Adventure, Drama
TV.Com Ratings Rank: 2,364 of 18,011
Episode: Planet of the Frohikes: A Short History of My Demeaning Captivity
Season: 1
Aired: 4/6/2001
TV.com Episode Recap: The Lone Gunmen receive an email from a monkey that has been subjected to secret government tests. The gunmen are shocked to find out that their contact is in fact a genetically altered, super monkey, who requires their help.

Series Games:The Moral Of The Story!

Back somewhere around 1979-81, there was a TV show about a chimp who wore a suit and could talk. That's all I really remember about it. I think he might have been a mayor or some other kind of politician, but who knows. Anyway, as part of the promotion for this hideous show, they had this phone number you could call to hear a message from him and hear one of his jokes. The Chimp had a lot of jokes (and a voice that sounded a little like Frank Welker doing Nibbler on Futurama). What I didn't realize was that it was 75 cents a call. And I burned that fucking phone line UP.

See, I was ten years old, and talking suit wearing chimps were funny to me. At ten years old. Around the time I was twelve that shit was OVER. Never again have talking suit wearing chimps been funny or remotely entertaining to me. As a matter of fact, I think it's safe to say that talking suit wearing chimps SUCK TONS OF ASS.

Especially on TV.

So this talking (through a computer) suit wearing chimp of an episode sucked tons of ass. It was really the only episode of this wonderful way too short TV series to be pretty much unwatchable. I suffered through it again for this blog, the first time I'd seen it since it aired, but boy did it SUCK. The humor was forced and way too chimp reliant. Even Jimmy was lame in this one.

So, while I ponder what in the HELL is TV and movies' fascination with apes and chimps, especially ones who act human or near human, I'll get to the moral:

"If you run up $75 calling a chimp phone line so you can giggle at his lame suit wearing chimp jokes, you're going to get that ass spanked and hate chimp TV for LIFE!"